But seriously, God?!

So I’m guessing you might have a few questions in your mind about this homeschooling journey… let me start answering a few for you!

(*disclaimer: if you’re a certain type of homeschooler you might take some objection to my stereotypes… forgive me, it’s mostly in jest (largely at myself) and I make no apologies for my Christian faith… it’s my blog… if you don’t like my thinking you are welcome to unfollow me… I won’t be offended… but please don’t be insulting or rude about my beliefs)

 

I’m one of those people who has always said “I’d never be a homeschooler… fine for other people…” Ahem, I was SERIOUS about that God! This isn’t funny anymore! And please, “you’re really brave, I couldn’t do what you’re doing…” just isn’t cutting it right now!

I CAN’T DO WHAT I’M DOING!!!!!!

Believe me, if you’d got to the situation I’d got to I promise you (unless your mother-heart does not beat in your chest!) YOU would do what I’m doing too! More on that later when I’m not quite so emotionally wound up and tired!

Homeschooling has always been right up there with bungee jumping and pet tarantulas! I mean hey, if that’s your thing, good for you! But I send my children to school to be educated! I know some mothers like to be home, more power to them… but not me! No siree!

Funny thing, last Thursday night (yes that is a mere 5 days ago!), I came home from school information night saying “whoah, I cannot believe those parents… they actually take intense interest in their kids homework… crazy! I send them to school to be educated! Homework?! Totally trust them to do it… maths… wouldn’t have a clue! If they’ve got an issue, sure I’ll help but otherwise…” Maybe God was listening?!

Hey, let’s take this chick out of her comfort zone… she thinks she’s got her year mapped out! Yep, this year was going to be the year of easing back into the workforce… a day a week maybe… after 12 years home with kids… on a tight budget… surely it’s time…

No, but seriously, God…

This is a MASSIVE life shift for me… I never wanted to be a teacher… I have not a clue… we’re talking east from the west stuff… this doesn’t impact anyone like it impacts me…

But I know that the decision we made over the weekend is absolutely the right decision for our son. Not a moment of hesitation.

I also know that God and I have had a relationship a long, long time… we’ve been through a lot of ups and down, some major trauma, some huge disappointments, piles of broken situation, and he has always proved himself faithful. He’s just stood by me through thick and thin, even when I was having some pretty direct words with him about what he was doing! So, I’m pretty confident that if this is what he’s asking me to do, then he’ll find a way to walk me through it.

I have NO backup plan.

All the local schools have long waiting lists. I am simply surrounded by shut doors at the moment. And what I have in front of me is a boy who is relaxed and cheerful! Who wants to work. Who has come home moody for so many years and gone to his room… and now I cannot stop him jabbering away all day!

 

How can I possibly go with anything other than what I believe God has set before me?

But I’ll be honest, I am really struggling with this. I feel incredibly emotional. The circumstances and backstory are not fun. And I feel that a choice was largely made for me. I’d love him to be in a school where he is happy. But instead God has decided that I should homeschool.

And now I understand a little bit more why some people homeschool… because they run out of other options and they care too much about their kids not to…

I assume this is an ongoing discussion with God… I know this journey is going to be hard at many points. The fact that my kitchen… school… and laundry are all in a line is already giving me the heeby jeebies! Just don’t make me wear an apron and bake my own bread! I may just run screaming from the room!

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About purplecamels

I'm a slightly crazy mother of 3, wife of 1, who loves adding colour to everything, being creative, and spending time with people. I am very grateful God is in control, though sometimes I wish He'd give a little more notice when He's got plans for my life!
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