Out of step…

Last night I went to my daughter’s school production. Of course she was fabulous! Loads of circus colour…

But what I came away with was a real sense of being out of place, a bit of an inconvenience, in a not altogether pleasant category of my own… problem is I have one in school, one out of school… I pulled one from school because I was unhappy with how things were dealt with, but I have one who is still happy at school. So where do I belong? I don’t feel I belong there. But nor be I feel I belong where I am.

It feels like no one really wants to engage me too deeply in conversation, and I feel uncomfortable too. Things unsaid, unacknowledged, unheeded. Just awkward.

I never wanted to be a homeschooler, even now it’s hard to feel like I really fit. Maybe over time I will feel a sense of belonging again. But right now I feel like I just don’t fit.

This punk album over sums it up perfectly… “Minor Threat: Out of Step”.

Minor Threat - Out Of Step LP

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About purplecamels

I'm a slightly crazy mother of 3, wife of 1, who loves adding colour to everything, being creative, and spending time with people. I am very grateful God is in control, though sometimes I wish He'd give a little more notice when He's got plans for my life!
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3 Responses to Out of step…

  1. jmarg72 says:

    Hi I’ve been enjoying reading your blog this year. I’m so sorry to hear you felt like this. It must be very hard to straddle two worlds as it is, without that kind of response. I sometimes think that we’re not very good at taking each child as an individual, even in the same family, and then making schooling choices accordingly. It looks like I will have kids in four different schools next year because my older three will be at three different high schools. It’s not great for me, but we had to look at what would work for each child. Good on you for serving your child in this way and I hope your school community can come to terms with your choice with some grace and kindness.

  2. Narelle says:

    You fit πŸ™‚
    It just takes a bit of time to walk-in the new shoes

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